You took from me

You took from me

By Jae Vel


You took from me 

Over and over 

You took from me 

You took years

You took my smile for a while 

You took my trust

You took my peace 

You took from me 

Over and over 

You took from me

You took my balance 

You took part of my sanity

You took my voice for so long 

You took a part of me 

 

You took from me

You never said why

You kept taking 

You never asked

You took from me 

Over and over 

You took my control 

You took my sense of self 

You took what I didn’t want to give 

You took my security 

You took from me

Over and over

You took from me

You took my choice 

You took my childhood dream

You took off my rose colored glasses

You took so much 

But you didn’t take my hope

You didn’t take my strength

You didn’t take my will

You didn’t take it all 

You took from me

Over and over 

You took from me

You took 

You almost broke me completely 

But you didn’t take all of me 

You didn’t take away my fight

You didn’t take my mind

You tried to take it all

But you didn’t succeed 

You took 

I survived 

You took 

I never gave 

You took

I forgave 

I found my voice

I found my smile 

You tried to take it all

You failed

I survived 

I rose again 

 

Time to mourn

Time to Mourn

-Jae Vel

I never truly mourned the loss of you

I kept a part of the pain inside

I used it to fuel the rage, to fuel, me

I held back tears because I didn’t want to seem weak

I held back because I had hope that you would one day return

I only let some of the pain seep through

it was reflected in my writing, my song choices and my eyes

the pain, the sadness, the void you left behind never left

I couldn’t cry, I wouldn’t cry, I wanted to keep a part of you with me

Even through the pain I wanted you here

I held on so tight for so long that I lost touch with reality

So many years, so much wasted time half mourning you and half hoping

I would catch glimpses of you and my eyes would light up again

Only to be thrown into despair

A despair of my own volition

You never told me to hold on

You never said anything

You just up and left one day

And I’ve been lingering in purgatory

In a state of unbalance

Without giving myself permission to mourn

To mourn the loss of you

Of us

Of time

Of hope

Of reality

Edge of Oblivion

Edge of Oblivion

-Jae Vel

 

On the edge of oblivion,

 

Her heart pauses when she needs to react

The beckoning darkness a constant jest

 

edge of oblivion…

 

Hanging on to life,

oh, that smile

 

On the edge of oblivion she teeters

Inundated with memories and fears

 

power she can give,

or take away

which is it today?
no, she is not “okay”

sorry, not sorry, which is it today?

 

drowning in words,

but aren’t words only words?

 

the edge of oblivion nears

and silence is all she hears